I have not been meditating lately.
I have been doing my prayers (I do the Jesus prayer a few hundred times daily).
though I feel like I am missing #zazen so I may go do that in a minute.
The #Zen paradox is not doing requires effort. Or, at the very least an act of will.
Severe depression has taught mean there is a distinct difference between doing nothing and just sitting.
Zen is seeing something you can't unsee but also you have to pursue through a practice of not pursuing.