disabled.social is one of the many independent Mastodon servers you can use to participate in the fediverse.
A place for people who are chronically ill, mentally ill, disabled, and friends/families/allies to come together, meet, share knowledge and random banter, and just about anything else.

Server stats:

225
active users

Tiffany

I am thinking about autism this morning. Every self-assessment I’ve taken since I was a teenager scores ‘yep, that’s you’. (I have taken a LOT of self-assessments. Every few years I’ll go through a whole bunch, just to confirm.) But I don’t have a formal diagnosis. And even though I would never require a formal diagnosis from anyone else, I have still, for decades, struggled to know whether I’m ‘allowed’ to understand myself in this way or speak about myself as .

On mornings like this when I’m melancholy and feeling lonely (and this question of whether I’m allowed to know myself as autistic and use this language for myself and be in the community rather than just advocating for the community as an outsider… this question is having me feel like I’ll always be lonely). Anyway, on mornings like this I feel a bit sad and uncertain about everything. And I just want to know the right answer.

@Tiffany

You are allowed and you're welcome to use it. Autism isn't about a diagnosis of any type. It's about human beings and neurotype. Nobody asked you to be like this or this. You're autistic from the birth to the last sleep with or without a piece of paper called diagnosis.

We absolutely need to upgrade this imaginary. The last 10 years of research and knowledge on autism indicate that we are in the social model of disability. It (partially) invalidates the narrative of the mandatory diagnosis. We are in a world of neurodiversity. Autists are happy to welcome everyone.

@Tiffany One way I like to think of it is not “am I definitely, 100%, absolutely positively autistic because if there’s the slightest doubt I can’t claim the label”, but more “what is the most likely neurotype I have?” If you fit the profile of an autistic person and not an allistic person, I’d say you’re autistic. And if you fit with the community and find resources for autistic people helpful for you, it’s probably because you’re autistic!

@Tiffany

I personally see self-DX as valid, and most of the community seems to as well. It's incredibly expensive and difficult, particularly for adults, to get a formal diagnosis.

Honestly, as far as I am concerned, if you think you are autistic, then you are autistic. It's really that simple.

i am recently self-DX. As in, last month recently. I am autistic, and I am happy to claim it. It helps me understand so much about myself.

@janetlogan Yes!! I feel that way, too. Though mostly for everyone else. I think I am afraid that secretly on some level I’m trying to trick people, or being ‘attention seeking’ as I have been accused of so many times in my life. But it does explain a lot about me, and on the inside it’s been how I understand myself for a long time. It’s just the outside/open piece that feels hard. And I wish I understood why!

Congratulations on you claiming the label that feels right. That’s wonderful.

@Tiffany

Girl, I have spent years wondering, feeling it wasn't my right to claim that label. I only got there with the help of the #ActuallyAutistic community here.

Claiming any (invisible) disability is always hard. You're convinced you re appropriating the label. At least, I was.

It probably helped that I was finally able to acknowledge the fact of my chronic illnesses, and the disability they cause.

Edit: my apologies for the "girl" label. I should have read your profile before posting.

@janetlogan Yes, that is it exactly. That fear of appropriating.

Thank you for the encouragement and support. <3

@Tiffany

Welcome to the community. Yes, I will speak for the community on this, and extend to you the generous welcome that I felt.